Daddy's First Day

Well It's my first night alone with the baby and so far things are going good. I had hoped to find some blue dye to bath the baby in. Oh, I'd cover his hand feet and face of course but the rest of him could be a lovely shade of indigo. Take note, If your wife comes home from her first overnight trip and her baby looks like an Umppa Looompa you can rest assured you'll never have to watch the baby all night again. Sadly, there are no rubber bands to affix the baggies to his hands. plus he seems frightened of the blue water. Perhaps some evolutionary throwback to preclude a youngster from sticking his head in a toilet. Regardless I will have to come up with some other devious plot to keep her from leaving. mmmmm.... well I am stumped for ideas unless my faithful readers have any?? let me know..